Nightmares

     Last night, I had a nightmare. When I awakened from it, my heart was pounding, and I couldn’t move (paralyzed by fear?). As I lay there, I thought about everything but the dream’s details because I knew that if I thought about the specifics of the dream, I would make things worse for myself.

     One thought I concentrated on was how my heart was doing. It was pounding, but my thought was that while it was pounding, it wasn’t beating irregularly. Before heading off to dreamland, my heart was experiencing PVCs (Premature Ventricular Contractions). PVCs occur when the heart beats prematurely – a beat or two that occurs before they are supposed to. It feels like a racing heart, but it’s not. Since I’m in the throes of menopause, I’m used to my PVCs occurring sometimes. They happen when I’m stationary, not moving, not walking, not active. I take magnesium taurate to reduce the occurrence of PVCs. Despite the reduction, I still experience them occasionally. After a disturbing dream, a pounding but regular heartbeat is good news to me because I know that, eventually, the strong beats will subside and return to normal. 

  

     I don’t often have nightmares. To get to sleep, I take melatonin. Sometimes, melatonin causes nightmares or vivid dreams. Last night was my lucky night!

     I have been experiencing a great deal of stress lately, okay, not just lately, but ongoing for the past three years. From moving to a new place (three years ago) to grieving over the deaths of pets and family members (as recent as June of this year), I have been under duress. As far as the grieving goes, I have not had a good cry since the death of one of my cats (Bella, Nov. 15, 2012).

     My most recent stress would be trivial in other people’s minds – setting up and making my semi-annual dental appointment. I do not look forward to these once-every-six-months-teeth-cleaning appointments. I also don’t believe I’m alone in this feeling. My problem, lately, is getting up in the morning to make that appointment. I already have to awaken in the morning to get ready and go to work. Making the dental appointment requires me to get up earlier than my usual time (of 9:30 AM).

     Most people I know would scoff at that time and consider it to be late. I am a night owl, through and through. There’s no changing that for me. Trust me; I’ve tried many times to convert to the morning lark routine. I can keep that up for roughly three to four days before I revert to my night owl-ness.

     Back to the dental appointment, I missed that appointment, so, now, I’m stressed because I have to reschedule it, which is just as stressful as missing it. At least, after I’ve had my teeth cleaned, I know I can relax for another six months. This morning, upon realizing I overslept the appointment, I complained, to no one in particular, about having to go in the first place. We go to get our teeth cleaned twice a year, but don’t we already have clean teeth? Don’t we brush and floss after every meal, every snack, every time we put something in our mouths? I know this is irrational thinking, brought on by anger at having missed that all-too-important visit. However, when my life is turned upside-down, even for a brief moment, rationalization (or, rather, irrationalization) creeps in and takes over my normal thought processes.

     I missed that appointment not just because I overslept. I missed it because I had a nightmare that made me lose precious moments of sleep. I knew I was already going to lose precious hours of sleep when I went to sleep at 3 AM and had to get up by 8 AM. The nightmare exacerbated the problem for me. I knew that getting up at 8 AM would make me extremely tired by the time my 8 PM class started (and worse so when it ended about 2 hours later). Subconsciously, I ruined that appointment for myself. I talked (and dreamed) myself out of it, didn’t I?

     Because mornings are bad for me, anyway, I’m going to request an afternoon appointment that I know I can make (between classes). I still won’t be looking forward to it, but, at least, I’ll be able to go and get it over with just for another six-month-peace-of-mind.

     For me, then, nightmares are not simply bad dreams during sleep. My nightmares comprise the stressful moments in my life. By all means, these moments are not as bad as they could be. I feel blessed with what I have, and I am, certainly, not suffering great misfortunes in life. I’m just saying that the stresses that have been building are becoming a burden for me, and if I don’t do something soon to eradicate it, I could become physically ill. I’ve experienced stress-induced illness before: from the common cold (twice in a four-month period) to a rash on my hands that could only be healed by antibiotics and a prescribed cream to a bilateral, bacterial inner ear infection with side effects that took several months to heal.

     Now, my quest is to find positive ways to deal with the stress. Prayer is a good way to relieve stress. I’ve always asked God to help me through life. I’ve always thanked Him for the blessings He has given me. He has not and will never let me down. Blogging is another way to release stress. I love to color (yes, color). I have a set of designs (mandalas) I could print and color. In the past, that has worked to help relieve stressful moments. I know, too, that I probably need to cry my eyes out to deal with the deaths in my family, and the best way I know of to do that would be to watch a sad, heart-wrenching movie. I guess that’s the best place to start – to look for a good, but sad, heart-wrenching flick.

Cooking

     Last month, I told my students that I love recipes, but I hate to cook. Of course, they gave me this odd stare. I'm sure they were wondering how anyone could like recipes but hate to cook. Now that I think about it, it does seem odd, even to me. However, it is true. I don't really care to cook unless the dish is very easy to make.

     Today, I baked an oatmeal crumble topping because I've been craving it lately. I did quite a bit of research on what ingredients were in it (besides oatmeal) and what process I had to do to complete the recipe. I was looking for a recipe that would tell me how to bake the topping without first putting it on top of a fruit pie. Most of the recipes in both recipe websites and cookbooks listed the same basic ingredients: rolled oats (quick or traditional), brown sugar, flour, and butter (or margarine). I wanted to make the topping so that I could have it on hand to sprinkle over microwaved fruit. This craving started when I bought and tried Dole's Fruit Crisps (peach). The package contains two individual servings (plastic cups) of glazed fruit with separate topping containers. Each fruit cup is covered with a plastic sheet that is glued around the edges so that it doesn't spill all over the place (typical packaging by manufacturers). Each topping container is hard plastic and covered with foil (also glued around the edges). The topping container serves as a lid when turned upside-down.

 

     The topping container is made of a clear, hard plastic. Naturally, this means I will use it as a lid. I simply cannot throw it away when I can use it for something else. Below is a picture of the empty fruit cup, the topping lid (also empty), and a piece of foil (not the original packaging foil you see in the above picture).

     By itself, the topping lid is a bit too loose for the empty fruit cup, but with a sheet of foil on it, it's a nice fit. I could probably just put a strip of foil around the inside edge of the topping lid, and it would still fit well on the container. If I just want to keep a lid on the container but the lid doesn't need to fit securely on it, I could omit the foil.

     Below is the recipe with my comments in the directions because I added comments before, during, and after baking the topping.

Oatmeal Crumble Topping

Ingredients: [Exact measurements were taken from the Dehydrator bible]

½ C. quick-cooking rolled oats

½ C. packed brown sugar

¼ C. all-purpose flour

¼ tsp. ground cinnamon

¼ C. cold butter, cut into pieces

Process: Preheat oven to 375°F

In a bowl, combine oats, brown sugar, flour, and cinnamon. With clean hands, mix the ingredients together (yes, mix it up with your hands). Pour the topping mixture into a pie pan (aluminum or glass, I used a large aluminum pie pan) and spread out the mixture so that it covers the bottom of the pan. Bake in the preheated oven for 10 minutes. After those first 10 minutes, pull pan out of oven and toss the mixture around. Put the pan back in the oven and bake for another 10 minutes. Pull pan from oven and let the topping cool for about 10 minutes before using it. Store in an airtight container in the refrigerator. The mixture makes about one and a half cups baked. 

My homemade oatmeal crumble topping added to a Dole Peach Fruit cup

     Just before microwaving the Dole Fruit cup, I add a little bit of cinnamon-sugar and an even smaller amount of sea salt (about 2 shakes from the salt shaker). I've noticed that without the extras, the peach flavor is a bit on the bland side for me. I stir the cinnamon-sugar and salt into the fruit mix and put the fruit cup in the microwave for about 25 seconds on high (my microwave oven is a 1300-watt one). Dole's instructions for heating the fruit cup is 20-30 seconds. Then, I add my oatmeal crumble topping. 

     Just so you know, everything was absolutely delicious! I put the oatmeal crumble topping in a 2-cup plastic container (a generic version of Ziploc's containers with screw-top lids) and put it in the refrigerator. The next time I want a sweet, crunchy topping on some fruit, I will have it on hand. Since making this topping, I've put glazed fruit on my shopping list.

Journal-Writing

     I was going to write a comparison-contrast post on Blogger and WordPress, but after I researched the topic, I decided the world has enough articles on it. Hands down, Blogger is my favorite site for writing down my thoughts and showing the world of readers what's going on in my life. I will, from time to time, add a post to WordPress, but I probably won't share many pictures because I've learned that once I use up the limited amount of space on WP, I will have to pay to expand. At this point in my life, spending money on blogging is out of the picture.
     I am used to Blogger as I've been writing entries in here for several years. Only recently have I started to write on a more regular basis. When I first started journal-writing, I didn't know what I wanted to write about, or maybe I didn't think anyone wanted to read anything I wanted to write about. Therefore, I slacked off on my writing.
     I keep a hard-copy journal, and I write in it occasionally. I have to say, however, that I haven't written in that journal for several months, and every time I start an entry in it, I write promises that I'll write more often (perhaps, tomorrow, I will actually write in that journal). I think I haven't been writing in the journal notebook because I don't have a couch. This is where my readers are thinking, "What are you talking about? You don't need a couch to write in a journal." Perhaps, an explanation is due.
      When I lived at my old place, I had a couch. I kept my journal notebook in a cubbyhole in the coffee table so that I could have easy access to it. Now, in my new place, I don't have a couch (yet), and my journal notebook is in my travel bag in my bedroom. I spend my waking hours at my desk, which is downstairs. This is another reason I need a couch: I'm spending too much time at my desk.
     I guess, tomorrow, I'll put the journal on a shelf under my desk (after I write an entry in it, of course). I have an adhesive whiteboard-like sheet on the wall next to my desk, and to remind myself to write in the hard-copy journal, I'll write a note on that wall-sheet. The picture below is half of the adhesive sheet on my wall. It has a quotation from Francis Bacon on the top and the spring 2013 semester checklist on the right-hand side of the sheet. Above the sheet is a calendar (that one is July); I have four of those on the wall above the sheet (currently reading from left to right and down: April, May, June, July). Directly above my pc monitor is a larger calendar (August).

     Now, perhaps, you might be wondering why August is on the larger calendar. Okay, I'll tell you why. The larger calendar (also adhesive) is for January and August of each year because they are starting months for the spring and fall semesters. August has been written on the calendar now. When this month (July) is over, I will erase April, May, June, and July from the smaller wall calendars and re-label/re-number them September, October, November, and December. I need to have the January to May and August to December calendars within easy view so that I can plan my lessons, homework assignments, tests, projects, and meetings.
     I hope you don't mind the links I've provided for you. I figure you might want to know where I bought these items, so I added links to them (in Amazon). The links should take you directly to the item's page. If they don't, please let me know.
     Whether I write here in Blogger (or WP) or in my journal notebook, I am writing my thoughts, and there are myriad benefits to "journaling." If you don't believe me, here's a website that may convince you to journal more: http://www.appleseeds.org/100_journaling.htm.

Cat Stuff

     I’m sitting here, at my desk, pecking the keys, slowly but steadily (not surely as some of you may have thought I would write), on the On-Screen Keyboard because my 14-year-old cat is stretched out across the front of the desk, blocking my access to the tangible keyboard. Obviously, using the unreachable keyboard would make typing this post so much easier; however, I will not disturb Moky just so I can jot down a few thoughts. Just as soon as I finished this first paragraph, Moky left the desktop. Now, I can use the real keyboard to type my entry.

     I have three cats: Moky (14 years old), Gypsy (13 years old), and Stormy (5 years old). I used to have four cats. The fourth cat was Bella. She died last November from the feline leukemia virus. She was not yet two years old when she died.

Bella

 

     The three cats I have now have their own quirks. Those are what make my cats unique. My cats make my life enjoyable. They also make my life healthier. [For further reading, try this website on the benefits of having cats: http://mritechnicianschools.net/2010/17-health-benefits-of-owning-a-cat.]

     Cats, generally, are healthy for humans. A purring cat creates a contented atmosphere, for both the cat and the human. I love when Gypsy lies on my lap because she purrs from the moment she steps onto my lap to the moment she falls asleep. Of the three cats I have, Gypsy has the loudest and most prevailing purrs. 

Gypsy

      Cats have a healing power to them. Gypsy’s warmth is especially comforting to me when she lies down next to me while I’m trying to fall asleep. I call her my feline heating pad because while I’m lying on my side, Gypsy will snuggle next to me, purring and emitting a profound warmth.

     When I am feeling blue or stressed, Stormy comes to my aid. She is the one who senses my sadness the most. When Bella died, Stormy often came to me, as if to see how I was doing or feeling. She would come up to me and look me in the eye. This was her way of seeking acknowledgement from me. I would look at her and say, “Hi, Stormy!” Then, she would rub her face against my hand and lick my arm. Stormy is my hugger. When she needs me, I usually also need her. She walks on my lap, and I say, “Stormy! Give me a hug!” Then, she stands so that her left side is facing me, and I wrap my arms around her and give her a hug. She does not squirm or run away when I do this. She is a big cat, which is why I love giving her hugs (weighing in at 12 pounds at the last vet visit in November 2012).

Stormy

      I am a patient and optimistic person. I think my cats have helped me with those two traits. Moky can be the most annoying because of his constant “talking,” but he has taught me patience, ten-fold. His idiosyncrasies include talking, kneading everything except scratching posts (including sneakers if I let him), batting cardboard box flaps (and vertical blinds), and trying to get into my drinking glass (I keep a lid on my drinking glass to keep Moky out of it).

     Moky loves to be groomed, and his favorite “tool” is the lint roller. I think he’s attracted to the sticky part of the lint sheets on the roller. He’s also a nut for the packaging tape on boxes. I do my best to keep him from getting to that kind of adhesive because I don’t know if it’s good for him (erring on the side of caution). When I groom the cats, Moky’s the first in line. I usually start grooming him with a brush, and then, I move to a grooming glove (bristled just for pet grooming). The last tool I use is the lint roller. I don’t let Moky sniff the roller because I know he’s trying to get at the adhesive on the lint roller sheets. Moky would prefer I groom only him as he tries to worm his way into my grooming of Stormy and Gypsy. I guess that is another quirk Moky has.

Moky

 

     My three cats have their own personalities. I am quite amused by their actions and behaviors, and I have no idea what I would do without them in my life.

Coping with Change

     I do my best to keep up with technological changes in today's world. Ignore the fact that I still own and use an iPhone 3GS (a dinosaur of iPhones). A recent change (today) occurred when I decided to combine my blogs with my Google+ account. A few days ago, I merely glanced at the information page regarding the merge, but, at that time, I just wanted to type a post and add it to my other posts. As I'm typing this post via an iPad app, I'm also looking at my Google+ profile page as the public would see it. That brings to mind another recent change: using my real name on YouTube. Anyway, I'm looking at my G+ profile page, and I notice that there's a link to my YouTube page. I want you to know that I have not posted/uploaded any videos to YouTube. I created the account so that I could watch videos and subscribe to the ones I like and view the most. Update: By the way, I just uploaded my own video; it's the one Blogger should have uploaded in my previous post (written earlier today). I'm adjusting and adapting to change! Yay!!! YouTube has this new feature called One Channel, so, naturally, since I'm on the bandwagon to technologically change with the times today, I switched to One Channel. I seem to be making a lot of changes today, but, actually, all but one of the changes are Google-related: Blogger merged to Google+, switching to One Channel in YouTube, and installing and using the Blogger app on my iPhone and iPad.

Changes, continued

     Today, I'm working on PowerPoint presentations for a friend/colleague of mine. I copied and pasted a paragraph from another presentation into the one I'm currently working on. With it came animation (Glide) that no longer exists in the Microsoft 2010 PowerPoint program. After I typed a title on the slide, I wanted the Glide animation, but when I clicked on the title and looked for the animation, no such kind existed. Then, I searched online for how to add an animation from a previous version to the MS 2010 PowerPoint program. 

     My results were futile, and I was ready to give up. I went back into the presentation and decided to add the title's text ("Addition") to the copied/pasted text so that "Addition" would have the same animation as the other text on the slide. A light bulb, of sorts, turned on in my head: I copied the copied/pasted text with the title now added to it. Then, on a blank area of the slide, I pasted the extra text box (so now I have 2 text boxes that contain the same thing). I clicked on the extra text box, positioned the cursor immediately after the title ("Addition"), and deleted all of the text after it. Then, I resized the text box and put it at the top of the slide. Now, both the title and the text below it (2 separate text boxes) play the same animation (Glide).

     I repeated the process for another slide where I had to add a text box via copy/paste from a previous-versioned presentation. This slide is called Time, and it shows a sample paragraph of how the time order is used in a paragraph or selection. The animation that came with the copied/pasted text box from another presentation is called Thread, and it is not included in the MS 2010 PowerPoint program. How annoying that is to those of us who enjoy using certain animations to convey messages to our students but those animations no longer exist in newer versions of Microsoft PowerPoint 2010!

     Changes like these really irk me. I'm annoyed because MS took it upon itself to remove certain features I (and others) consider to be important. That kind of change irritates me to no end. I have to live with it or find a way to modify it. Many times, I can modify changes to suit my needs. Sometimes, I cannot.

     A couple of days ago, I replaced the battery in my iPhone 3GS because I'm too poor to buy a new iPhone (I like iPhones, and there are other perks my iPhone and data plan have that I can't get from a new iPhone and data plan), and I didn't want to send the only cell phone I have to an Apple Service Center to get the battery replaced. 

     The old battery in my iPhone 3GS was dying; my phone would shut off during calls or texts or app use when it was at only 75 - 85% power. Online researching told me my iPhone's battery was on its last legs of life. I went to YouTube to watch videos on how to replace the old battery with a new one. I found a reputable website (www.ifixit.com) that not only showed me how to replace the battery (with a video, still photos, and step-by-step directions) but also sold me the battery replacement kit for a hair less than $20! Wow! 

                         
[The collage of pics above shows the innards of my iPhone 3GS, as well as the new and old batteries. The video that I hope will uphold after I press the Publish button shows the iPhone booting up and explains the tools I got from the Replacement kit. Then, I can be heard exclaiming joyously that the replacement process was successful.]

     The next change I will have to make will be to replace the graphics card in my desktop computer. This is a change I know how to do because I replaced the old graphics card with a new one about 13 months ago. This is a change that also somewhat irritates me because I don't think I should have to replace the graphics card if it is only a little over a year old. The old graphics card lasted from 2009 to 2012. I'm wondering if the replacement card was not so new, or maybe the graphics card I bought (same version and model as old one) was just as old as the one I replaced, but it hadn't been used on any other computers. That reasoning would explain why I now have to install a new card, a newer card, actually. This time, I ordered a card from a different manufacturer. The graphics card that is now in my computer is an NVidia card (NVIDIA GeForce GTS 240). The new one I recently received in the mail (from Dell) is an AMD Radeon graphics card by VisionTek (AMD Radeon HD 7850). Once I install the new card, I hope that this change is one I will be happy with now and in the future. 

     If you're wondering how old my computer is, it's four years old, and I am not planning on buying a new computer for quite some time (again, because of financial reasons). My computer is very capable of handling all my computer needs despite the recent problem with the graphics card. I bought it in 2009 because it has the ability to hold up to 12 tb (terabytes) of memory. Right now, it has 1.5 tb of memory. Despite all the programs I have installed on this computer, it still is running well.

     I, no doubt, will have other changes I will need to write about, but for now, I had to write about the change I was able to modify to suit my needs (ppt animations). Now, I have to finish the PowerPoint presentation, and start working on another one.